battle-axe
2003-06-17 @ 10:46 p.m.
i’m a pessimist . you know why i’m a pessimist ? i’m a pessimist because every time something even remotely good happens in my life it finds a way to fuck itself up . and that is why i’m a pessimist .
you should wake up before the wrath comes . i’ve done every possible thing to please you and you’re still not satisfied, you’re never fucking satisfied, i don’t know why i even try with you .. nothing pleases you ever ..
went to the dentist today, which has to be one of the most uncomfortable places in the world . don’t tell me about third world countries, damn it, the dentist’s office is the seventh circle of hell . all those sharp shiny tools and high pitched buzzing noises and that horrible chair they make you sit in . then they shove as many torture devices they can in your mouth and just leave you there for about an hour wondering, “why is there rubber in my mouth? i can’t breathe . i need to swallow . what are they doing anyway? ooh, pretty ceiling tiles .” then they come back and shove some more things in your mouth and give you three shots of novocain in your cheek, then leave for another hour . and this time you’re wondering, “why can’t i just die . i’d rather just die . i can’t believe we’re paying them to do this . they probably enjoy it too, the bastards . is my ear supposed to be numb?” sadomasochists, all of them .
“i wish i was a girl, so i wouldn’t have to work for everything .” god forbid you do some goddamn work in your life, you drop out of school and talk about working for things . believe it or not, having a vagina doesn’t automatically give you a fucking free ride through life . i paid for that car with bonds, and i have to work to pay the insurance, it is not being handed to me on a silver platter . i’ve worked my whole god damn life to make the grades so i can get into a good college and have a future, and you drop out and talk about working for things . i’ve given myself to you, done everything i can think of to make you happy, and you’re still pouting . but i won’t complain, i’ll just say sorry and wish i could help and i love you and maybe i’ll take up for myself some other time . sometimes i think there is no such thing as real love, but then i guess it wouldn’t hurt so much if i were right .
deftones . battle-axe
i want to sleep if you are awake
still making believe that you aren’t at all crazy
and if you don’t believe i think you should
you’d make me so proud
still you love to think you have always been this way
but you’re all wrong
and you only sleep when you’ve lost cause
well i still believe that the cause was always me
and if you don’t believe i think you should
you’d make me so proud
still you love to think you have always been this way
well i’d love to think you will someday feel the same
and you love to think it will always, always
if you still believe it will always be this way
well you’re all wrong
